It’s taken all year, but I finally found the perfect Christmas gift for Kim.

Yes, yes, I know she has an irrational fear of birds and a pathological aversion to big gaudy jewelry. But I think having an actual stuffed bird’s head mounted to a big silver plaque on a chain around her neck will help desensitize her to both things at once.

Now all I need to find is a nice animal print top for her to wear with it. This will be a Christmas she will always remember!

(I am sooo gonna wind up spending New Year’s alone…)