Honey, Lie Down. We Need to Talk

Science pushes forward yet again, revealing this time that people are less likely to retaliate to insults while lying down. Unfortunately they still become as subjectively angry, they are just less likely to smack you when reclined.

I guess maybe bank robbers had it right all along. If you’re going to piss people off, make them lay down on the floor first. Although, short of holding a weapon on someone, it’s hard to see how you might persuade them to get prone prior to annoying them. So clearly I’m struggling with the practical application of this information. Although I suppose you could use it on yourself by lying down prior to hearing something you know is going to tick you off. Places such as:

  • At the Auto Repair Shop – “Yes, we’ve fixed your cigarette lighter. That will be $575.25 with tax.”
  • In Divorce Court – “The court finds…”
  • On the Phone with Tech Support – “Thank you for calling. Your current expected wait time to speak to someone who will read our database to you with an accent you can’t understand is… “
  • At the Doctor’s Office – “Well these things are perfectly normal as we get older.”
  • Your Friend Is at the Door – “You know when I borrowed your truck this morning…”
  • In Your Boss’ Office – “You’ve been with us many years, but times are tough…”

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