Here’s the setup: I had ordered a new motherboard for a computer I was building. The board worked fine except for the onboard sound. I was dreading the pain-in-the-butt RMA process which would be required to fix this. Not only would I need to rip the PC all back apart, but then ship it back, wait a few weeks and wait for the repaired board to return. Ugh. I need a Plan B.

So with a quick web search I found a $25 USB fob that would replace the sound function on the motherboard. This was a small price to pay compared to the aggravation of repairing the board. I checked, and the local Best Buy store had them in stock. Great. I was hoping to deliver the computer that night, Best Buy was on my way, and the device should only take a few minutes to install onsite. I finished the last couple steps of the build, packed the PC up and headed out.

I’m thinking that the Best Buy stop should be a quick in-and-out. And it should have been…

Walking in the door I head straight back to the computer department. Uncharacteristically, I don’t even search the isles, I walk straight up to an employee and tell him what I’m looking for. The guy promptly takes me to a shelf and hands me a PCI sound card. I explain that this isn’t what I’m looking for. I want the USB device. The next 15 minutes went like this:

“We don’t carry that.”
“Really?, your website says you carry them and that this store has them in stock.”
“Well sometimes the website is wrong.”
“Maybe you could look?”
“Oh alright…”

He then grumbles over to the service desk where he starts looking the device up on the computer. I wander over and peer over his shoulder.

“Look, you have 5 of them in stock!”
“Well, I don’t know where they would be, I’ve never seen them.”
“Maybe you could look?”

So Captain Happy then fumbles about on his computer some more and it shows him the shelf where the stealthy devices are kept. It turns out they are located right across from the computer station he’s working at. The guy stares at this shelf all day. We walk over and he hands me on.

“Is that what you’re looking for?”
“Yeah, thanks. Now I have one question, is the plug on the back a 3.5mm or 2.5mm plug? I can’t see it through the packaging and neither the website nor the package specify that.”
“I dunno.”
“How do we find out? If I need an adapter, I want to know now.”
“We don’t carry those adapters.”

I desperately wanted to ask how the hell he would know that given his stellar knowledge of the inventory, but I managed to keep my urges in check.

“Well, can we open the package so I know for sure what size the plug is?”
“I can’t open the package.”
“Then how do I know what I’m buying?”
“You can take it home and if it’s not what you want then you can bring it back.”
“You’re maybe missing the point, I don’t really want to make multiple trips here.”
“Well, I can’t open the package.”
“Well, then I’ll open it.”
“You can’t do that unless you buy it.”
“Okay, so if I buy this, I can open it here and if it’s not what I want then you’ll give me a full refund all while I stand here?”
“Yeah, that would be okay.”
“And this makes sense to you?”
“Do you want to buy it?”
“Sure, let’s generate as much paperwork as we can.”

So I put it on my credit card, whip out my knife, and dive into the blisterpack. To my increasing amusement, the plug is sufficiently recessed in the fob that I cannot tell visually what size the plug is.

“Do you have a cable with either size plug on it so I can see what fits, or do I need to buy a cable too?”

After much grumbling and rummaging around under the counter the bluebird of happiness produces a cable with a 3.5mm plug. Lo and behold, it fits. I return the cable to him and gather up the parts of my new sound fob scattered on the counter.

“Thanks! Always a pleasure doing business here.”

It should be noted that he didn’t tell me to “come again.”