Fractured Christmas Carols

The boys and I have been working on mutilating a few of our favorite seasonal songs. We thought we should share. The tunes should be obvious.

Down from the housetop,
Reindeer fall,
Oh my God he’s killed them all!
There’s venison all over the lawn,
What’ll we do now?
Christmas’ gone.

Oh no no,
Please don’t go
Oh no no,
Please don’t go…

Up on the housetop,
Slip, slip, slip,
Crashing to the ground comes old St. Nick

And now for something more somber:

We three kings of Orient are,
Wishing we had driven a car,
Camels lumpy,
Desert’s bumpy,
Bethlehem’s fricken’ far.

Oh, oh,
We all wonder if we might,
Get to Bethlehem tonight,
Camel’s wheezing,
Man it’s freezing,
Why’d we follow that stupid light.

Merry Christmahanakwanzaa to all, and to all good Solstice

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