Admittedly, this is an option I overlooked.

You’ve got to admit, it has a certain appeal. Canada would certainly benefit from the economic power the coasts bring to the table. And residents of Jesusland would never miss it anyway as they don’t seem to care much about being employed or having health care as long as nobody gets killed what didn’t need it, and them faggots go back in the closet where they belong. In their evangelical arrogance, they’d probably bid us good riddance. At least until they get done converting the Middle East to God-fearin’ Christians and turn their gunsights north. But that’ll take ’em a while.

Oh, the humanity!