The good citizens of the state of Ohio went so far as to cut power to most of the northeast in order to keep their Canadian friends from embarrassing themselves with this bit of legislation. No wait. That can’t be right. When you’re embarrassed, you tend to smile. Maybe it’s the lack of sperm (see Aug. 16th) which is causing the dour expressions. No wait. That can’t be right. If they were naturally unhappy they wouldn’t need this rule. Honestly I’m mostly interested to see if it’s possible to take a legal passport photo of a five year old.

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