{"id":2558,"date":"2010-09-25T07:32:28","date_gmt":"2010-09-25T11:32:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/?p=2558"},"modified":"2010-09-23T15:48:15","modified_gmt":"2010-09-23T19:48:15","slug":"in-case-of-emergency-remove-bra","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/2010\/09\/in-case-of-emergency-remove-bra.html","title":{"rendered":"In Case of Emergency: Remove Bra"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/i.i.com.com\/cnwk.1d\/i\/tim\/2010\/09\/22\/croppedbra.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright\" title=\"Bra Mask\" src=\"http:\/\/i.i.com.com\/cnwk.1d\/i\/tim\/2010\/09\/22\/croppedbra.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"246\" height=\"172\" \/><\/a>There are any number of reasons women are good to have around.\u00a0 Here&#8217;s something to add to the list.\u00a0 In the event of a disaster with lots of airborne particulates&#8230; say a volcano, a dirty bomb, a collapsing skyscraper, or even a fire&#8230; your honey&#8217;s undergarments may be the key to both of you surviving.\u00a0 That is, assuming she&#8217;s wearing the <a href=\"http:\/\/ebbra.bigcartel.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Emergency Bra<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>This bra not only lifts and separates (or whatever it is bras usually do), but its cups are haz-mat breathing filters.\u00a0 It may be quickly disassembled into two functional and sexy masks.\u00a0 The theory being that when the alternative is sucking in lungfuls of radioactive dust, most anyone&#8217;s willing to have a red laced boob cover on their face.<\/p>\n<p>This puts women at a unique advantage in a disaster situation.\u00a0 As the inventor of this multi-tasker explained:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>Ladies and gentlemen, isn&#8217;t that wonderful that women have two breasts,  not just one? We can save not only our own life, but also the life of a  man of our choice next to us.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>So be on your best behavior boys.\u00a0 When the apocalypse comes, you don&#8217;t want to be in the dog house.\u00a0 And hopefully, the emergency bra won&#8217;t be in the laundry basket.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are any number of reasons women are good to have around.\u00a0 Here&#8217;s something to add to the list.\u00a0 In<\/p>\n<p class=\"readmore\"><a href=\"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/2010\/09\/in-case-of-emergency-remove-bra.html\" title=\"Read In Case of Emergency: Remove Bra\">Read more &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2558","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-geekypursuits","category-xx-xy"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2558","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2558"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2558\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2560,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2558\/revisions\/2560"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2558"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2558"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timscogitorium.com\/tinblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2558"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}